Sir Arthur C. Clarke is equally as awesome as Sir Sanford Fleming

OK, before I get on to mocking the whole Sri Lanka time change thing, let’s take a moment to enjoy what is possibly the best picture in the history of science fiction fandom:

Yes, that is a picture of Sir Arthur C. Clarke wearing a t-shirt that says I INVENTED THE SATELLITE AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT. You will never be as cool as Sir Arthur, and he’s what, 88? It’s OK, take another minute to enjoy that.

Now, on with the mocking. Here’s the article that contained this picture:

Time to end Sri Lanka time split?

Sri Lanka is a country divided not just by war, but also by time. Officially the country is six hours ahead of GMT. But in Tamil Tiger controlled areas, the time difference is five and a half hours ahead of GMT, the same as in India. Now that may change…

I’m not sure what’s more mockable, the fact that Sri Lanka is apparently changing their official time zones for the third time in ten years, or the fact that the Buddhist priests apparently think changing the time zones causes great spiritual disruption and ultimately natural disasters:

The Venerable Gnanawimala says the change moved the country to a spiritual plane 500 miles east of where it should be.

“After this change I feel that many troubles have been caused to Sri Lanka. Tsunamis and other natural disasters have been taking place,” he says.

The Venerable Gnanawimala, by the way, kind of looks like Sir Arthur. Maybe all skinny, bald dudes kind of look the same when they get to be venerable.

Sir Arthur talks sense, of course:

“If you’re trying to make international calls and you don’t know quite what the time is, it’s very inconvenient to you and to the person at the other end.”

Asked about the points made by Buddhist monks, he responds: “Any argument bringing religion into the discussion is fallacious.”

Boo ya! Take that Buddhists.

You who would stomp in there and put a stop to this foolishness right away, except for the inconvenient fact that he’s been dead for a while now? Sir Sanford Fleming.

All Canadians, of course, already understand this reference, but the rest of you can spend 60 seconds learning about the history of Standard Time. Also, as an engineer I am predisposed to dig ol’ Sanford.

Imagine if Fleming and Clarke teamed up: “He’s an octegenarian author and the Pride of Lanka, and he’s spent 90 years as the corpse of an octegenarian engineer. They fight crime!”