{"id":236,"date":"2005-06-07T09:31:43","date_gmt":"2005-06-07T13:31:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/archives\/2005\/06\/07\/picking-on-gwenda\/"},"modified":"2006-04-05T13:33:14","modified_gmt":"2006-04-05T17:33:14","slug":"picking-on-gwenda","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/2005\/06\/07\/picking-on-gwenda\/","title":{"rendered":"Picking On Gwenda"},"content":{"rendered":"

You may recall that once before I had a few minutes of boredom and picked on a friend<\/a> by putting his face through a series of transformations using the St. Andrews Face Morpher<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Well, yesterday I had a few minutes of boredom again, and this time I decided to pick on Gwenda<\/a>. I was debating picking on my wife or child, but frankly I fear the potential Wrath of Trish. <\/p>\n

I used this as the starting point:<\/p>\n

\"Normal\"<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Note that Gwenda, as is often the case, is carrying a glass of intoxicant, and that no matter what transformations we apply, the glass continues to be present with her in all the subsequent images. You can’t get The Widow<\/a> away from that woman, no matter what you do.<\/p>\n

So the first thing I did was make use of the “baby” transform, which kind of turns Gwenda into a scary looking doll. (It might have looked more realistic if the hair had changed.)<\/p>\n

\"Baby\"<\/p>\n

I assume that’s just grape juice in that glass. Of course I then had to go the other way and hit Gwenda with the “old lady” transform. Grannie there is still hitting the booze, note.<\/p>\n

\"Grannie<\/p>\n

Then I started to feel like an evil genius and so I obviously needed to construct a Devolution Ray…<\/p>\n

\"Dance<\/p>\n

Even when devolved several levels, she still holds onto the glass.<\/p>\n

Clearly the next step would be to start turning her into some kind of manga character…<\/p>\n

\"Sailor<\/p>\n

Hmm… I don’t like that much. Maybe a more classical artistic style is called for. Maybe something a little more like Botticelli:<\/p>\n

\"Woman<\/p>\n

“Woman With Champagne”? Hmm..<\/p>\n

Of course, if I were pure evil, the scariest thing I could do would be to apply the “she’s a man, baby” transform and turn Gwenda into a really poorly converted drag queen…<\/p>\n

\"Man-Gwenda\"<\/p>\n

Admit it, that one is pretty scary.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You may recall that once before I had a few minutes of boredom and picked on a friend by putting his face through a series of transformations using the St. Andrews Face Morpher. Well, yesterday I had a few minutes of boredom again, and this time I decided to pick on Gwenda. I was debating picking on my wife or… Read more →<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-236","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-storytime","xfolkentry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5UQvw-3O","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/236","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=236"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/236\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=236"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=236"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.chrismclaren.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=236"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}